WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize