A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
