Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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