Its about making memories worth repressing
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
