Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize