On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
