five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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