Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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