Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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