The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
