You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
