Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
