She is in my trunk
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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