Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
