Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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