Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
