dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
