a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
