I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
