i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
