What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
And then my night got REAL pukey
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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