How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize