The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
