I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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