found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Congratulations! We have a period
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