Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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