I'm gonna have a badass scar
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Ketchup is God's man juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
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