She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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