Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
