Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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