I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
