i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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