sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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