I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
