I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
