New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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