how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
