He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.