I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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