dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
