Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
