Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The power of my boobs compel you
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
