normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
