i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
vagina is talking i cant
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
