Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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