Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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