She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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