i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
