kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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