I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
i think my cat just said my name.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I am one with the molecules
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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