I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
